I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

I haven’t broken a mirror lately, but my water broke and I’ve had seven years of kids crawling into my bed.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Looking for someone who loves me as much as some people love standing up the second a plane lands.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.