Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who knew being the little spoon could turn into a literal back-packing experience? 🎒😂 Maybe next time go for a medium-sized utensil and avoid feeling like a walking hiking trail in bed! 😜"

backpack, bed, big, comfort, difference, guy, humor, i, let, once, relationship, short, short guy, size, size difference, spoon

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.

0

2 months ago

2, acting, alcohol, allowed, drink, drinks, humor, i, island, just, limitation, love, Love Island, night, only, over, reality, reality show, sarcasm, show, thing
Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

0

2 months ago

bartender, drinks, expensive, humor, liquor, shelf, stand, t, tippy, tippy t, top, top shelf
Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

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2 weeks ago

dumb, dumbest, engineer, ever, humor, intelligence, met, paradox, people, smart, software, software engineer
I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

0

2 months ago

alive, armpits, care, deodorant, feel, humor, hygiene, i, personal, personal care, shaving, still
I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

0

2 months ago

always, bottle, cheap, drinking, family, hosting, house, humor, i, visit, wine
There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

0

2 months ago

another, fencing, guys, humorous, joke, kiss, kissing, playful, romantic, should, sport, trying, variant

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on X this month:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Eating the rest of the donuts will keep me from eating donuts tomorrow. My logic is flawless.

65 shares on X this month:

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

91 shares on Twitch this month:

I do my best to kill everyone with kindness, but they don’t seem to be dying.

23 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve spent 80% of my adult life resetting my password.

77 shares on Messenger this month:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

82 shares on Pinterest this month:

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account?

44 shares on Messenger this month:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Flirting with submissives is actually really easy. All you gotta do is send a gif of a small animal and say, ‘This is so you.’

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I’m okay with being single. But at night, while I’m drunk, that’s too much.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I respect Sleeping Beauty. She took one look at the world and said, “Nah.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

If I got possessed demonically, I wouldn’t even notice it. With everything else I’ve got going on.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Rule number 1 at a concert: Don’t sing while filming!

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I was not made for a 9 to 5; I was made to eat pasta and lay in the sun like a lizard.

Just shared via WeChat:

You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Online dating is stupid because scent is such an important factor of attraction.

Shared recently on X:

I’m not shaking hands anymore. You may bow or kneel down.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My soulmate probably seen my posts and deleted me.

Shared recently on Discord:

You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

Seen just now on Threads:

Getting sent money you didn’t ask for is very sexy.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The thing I can’t get over about Love Island is they’re only allowed 2 drinks a night, like they’re all just acting like that.

Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.

Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨