I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

You don’t get to comment on the world until you’ve made your bed.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

I’ve left my past behind me, so if I owe you money, sorry, I’ve left it behind me.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

I got fired for telling customers if they wanted “smoking or non-smoking”. Apparently, the correct term in the funeral home business is “cremation or burial”.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”