If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Why a bug would spend such a long fraction of its short life immobile on my ceiling beats me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Fun fact: Did you know that removing junk food from your diet can help you lose up to 90% of your will to live?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Single in the womb, single till the tomb!

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Being a serial killer is much like being a comedian, in that you either hit it big and get your own Netflix special, or you spend eternity popping up on shitty podcasts.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

When the client says: “make it pop”, I have to ask myself whether he means my mind or the project.