Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

My greatest flaw is that I will try any specialty lemonade. 90% of them are nearly undrinkable, but I persevere.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

I hate checking my bank account after having a good time.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Wish I came with subtitles because I mumble a lot.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

He’s a 10, but it’s the pain scale.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,504

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Don’t bother telling me where you’re from, I have no geographical knowledge and no sense of direction.

Going bananas on X:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Just landed via Discord:

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Going viral on Telegram:

The book characters may be fictional, but my emotional instability over them is real.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

Making waves on Telegram:

Tiime isn’t on my side, it’s on my face, wrinkling my forehead.

Trending via Reddit:

My therapist said this to me, and it hit me like a brick: “They’re not your friends if they disagree with you or try to challenge you.”

Making waves on Messenger:

I often choose gift bags instead of wrapping, not just out of laziness, but also because I have the fine motor skills of a drunken panda.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

Just landed via Discord:

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

3 months ago

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When sarcasm is the love language, it’s hard not to fall head over heels 😂💬❤️

banter, better, catch, emotion, feelings, humor, i, just, respond, response, sarcasm, wit

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10 shares on YouTube this month:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I suck at charging my phone, 21 percent charged, and I’m taking it off so I can lay the other way.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

Being completely ignored on Twitter is associated with higher IQ.

62 shares on Instagram this month:

What if the universe wasn’t infinite or finite, but a secret third thing?

35 shares on YouTube this month:

They’re uploading my consciousness into a disposable vape.

26 shares on YouTube this month:

My OnlyFans is just me loading the dishwasher correctly.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

90 shares on Discord this month:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Whoever allowed me to become an adult needs to be fired.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

It’s so cool when people who write for a living admit that they don’t read books or have thoughts.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I’m having an orange, and the dogs keep looking at me like, “stop eating that ball, dude.”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

Going viral on Slack:

We are the last generation of programmers who know the deadly feeling of seeing the exact problem in our code, on Stack Overflow, with 0 answers.

Shared recently on WeChat:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I drive regularly so that my brain doesn’t forget swear words.

Trending via Discord:

Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

Trending via Slack:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

Spotted on WeChat:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I never wanted to download the Microsoft Authenticator app on my personal phone to access every professional platform necessary to do my job.

Making waves on Reddit:

I like how people say “manage your depression,” like it’s a stock portfolio, but you’re heavily invested in sadness.

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Activity Log ✨

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Some of you need to be visited by the ghost of ‘Quit emailing me so much before Christmas.’

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you respond to my sarcasm with better sarcasm, then I might just catch feelings.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Some of you need to be visited by the ghost of ‘Quit emailing me so much before Christmas.’

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨