Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Well, if Santa-shaped chocolate can cure upset stomachs, then sign me up for some Christmas magic 🎅🍫! Who needs medicine when you've got jolly ol' Saint Nick in chocolate form? 😂 #FestiveRemedies

chocolate, doctor, food, holiday, humor, joke, pretty, Santa, stomach, sure

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

0

2 months ago

animal, asking, cat, emotional, emotional support, humor, participation, still, support, want
A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

0

2 months ago

app, dating, dating app, humor, interaction, introvert, mumble, people, relationships, shy, social, social interaction, technology
Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

0

2 months ago

ass, broke, home, house, humor, i, left, Ludacris, money, once, staying, staying in, take
Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

0

5 months ago

adulthood, age, humor, know, life, life phase, me, nice, person, personality, phase, plea, please, twenty
Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

0

2 months ago

dine, dining, humor, IKEA, joke, money, object, order, restaurant, want
I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

0

2 months ago

believe, bro, communication, family, ghost, ghosting, humor, i, joke, me, personal, relationship, sarcasm, social, too

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Discord this month:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier woman.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

Walking on egg shells? In this economy?

78 shares on Telegram this month:

I am deeply overwhelmed and yet incredibly bored at the same time.

97 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

Both my wife and my doctor said no more jumping on the bed. But they don’t get it. They don’t know what it’s like to live with the Monkey Instinct.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

Today, I want to talk about how people’s houses smell funny, but mine doesn’t.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

31 shares on Slack this month:

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

30 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s okay to embarrass yourself a little in the pursuit of human connection.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

We’ve got a shituation here.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Tried a smile yesterday and my white blood cells attacked it.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Sorry for being weird. It’s just that everything I talk about reminds me of every other thing I wanna talk about, so I try to talk about everything at the same time and explode.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

“This too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

Just shared via YouTube:

Commas are like garlic, you measure with your heart.

Breaking via Messenger:

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Freshly posted on X:

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

Just shared via Facebook:

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Soon as vampires become real, I’m first in line for my bite.

Just landed via Messenger:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Just shared via Instagram:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

Broadcasted on Messenger:

My fondest childhood memory is being able to sleep through the entire night and waking up rested.

Spotted on X:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Ludacris once said “If you ain’t got no money take yo’ broke ass home” and I haven’t left the house since.

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨