Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Girls be like, “I hate this man,” then have sex with him.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Called in, “Let’s make this simple. What excuse haven’t I used yet?”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax, and rich people can go to jail.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I was once told that if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Due to this, I’ve been observing a vow of silence since 1997.

Just landed via Twitch:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

“Can you multitask?” Yes, actually I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

Just shared via Messenger:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Just landed via Instagram:

I wonder what John Connor thinks now that everyone is embracing AI.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

Just shared via Messenger:

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

Just landed via Telegram:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Humorous quote about aging gracefully, comparing oneself to wine stored in darkness.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"That's a mood—I too am in my 'vintage' phase, expertly avoiding sunlight! 🍷🕶️🌞"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on Messenger this month:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

I have never read a Hacker News thread where any of the commenters seemed as if their life contained joy.

92 shares on Telegram this month:

The real pandemic was when everyone was reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.

97 shares on Slack this month:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

80 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

53 shares on TikTok this month:

Waiting patiently for something good to happen, like that goat in Jurassic Park.

78 shares on Slack this month:

Unfortunately, a great many problems in life can be solved by just being hotter.

50 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The night terrors don’t scare me half as much as the day terrors.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m getting targeted ads about chin fat and I’m offended by the relevance.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when I lose things at work, like my favorite pen or my will to live.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you either have a naked window neighbor or you are the naked window neighbor.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“Don’t take this the wrong way!” Translation: Prepare for insult.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,655

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Getting sent money you didn’t ask for is very sexy.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

I giggle before I go crazy. Gotta start my engine.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

When the exam is so hard that you look out the window to appreciate nature.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Going to IKEA if anyone needs some meatballs.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Whenever you are feeling down, remember you’re the sperm that won.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

We should be able to call in healthy: “I feel amazing today, and I’m not wasting it at work.”

Freshly posted on Slack:

You ever got inside jokes with yourself, or is that schizophrenia?

Trending via LinkedIn:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Seen just now on WeChat:

Love when job applications ask for my desired salary so I can choose between not being hired and being exploited for my work.

Making waves on Slack:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Making waves on Facebook:

Imagine how organized the first person to write down a recipe must have been.

Just landed via Pinterest:

You’re telling me people get eight hours of sleep? Like in one night?

Making waves on Instagram:

My neighbor told me he heard me having sex this morning. I was putting on my shoes.

Going viral on YouTube:

It’s so embarrassing when attention seekers feel the need to tell everybody it’s their birthday in, like, every conversation, which, for me, would be today, by the way.

Trending via Threads:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

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