Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Taking off my house pajamas to put on my errands pajamas.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

All I’m saying is that big burgers should be wider not taller.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

That made me feel good. I think I’ll become addicted.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

My attempts to purge my possessions always seem to result in me rediscovering that I have lots of nice things, after which I lie happily on my hoard like a dragon.