Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Snakes don’t hiss anymore, they call you babe, bro, or friend.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Accidentally falling asleep on the couch is somehow always the best sleep.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I forgot to take my meds so I’m looking forward to joining the squirrels in the tree to talk politics.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,252

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Discovering the Spice Girls broke up not over money and fame but lesbianism.

Trending via Messenger:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Spotted on Snapchat:

Remember before social media you would have to pick up the phone and call someone to tell them how much you love bacon?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Going viral on Twitch:

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I grew up in a really small town. The closest thing we had to food delivery was someone egging your house.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The history of mankind would have been completely different if Adam and Eve had been Chinese. They would have left the apple hanging and eaten the snake.

Just shared via X:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I called the cops on my own party, because I was ready to go to bed.

My middle finger salutes you.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
That's one way to give someone a standing ovation with a twist! 😆🖕🎉

attitude, finger, gesture, humor, insult, middle, middle finger, rude, rude gesture, salute, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

0

2 months ago

attraction, boy, boys, disgusting, feeling, humor, relationship, thing, things
My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

0

5 months ago

awesome, awkward, feel, feeling, goal, humor, interaction, life, life goal, making, me, social, social interaction
Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

0

2 months ago

apple, coder, humor, jobs, just, prompt, steve, Steve Jobs, Steve Wozniak, technology, vibe, wozniak
I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

0

2 months ago

awards, bad, confusion, fact, forgetfulness, having, humor, i, irony, know, memory, recognition, self-deprecation, win
I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

0

2 months ago

am, dream, dream woman, enter, forest, hear, humor, i, nature, raven, ravens, shouting, sudden, surprise, surreal, unexpected, warning, woman
Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

0

2 months ago

audacity, bigger, carry, fashion, fashion joke, gender, gender stereotype, help, humor, jeans, joke, men’s, men’s jeans, pocket, pocket size, pockets, size, stereotype

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

89 shares on Threads this month:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

75 shares on Telegram this month:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

24 shares on Slack this month:

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

70 shares on Messenger this month:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

It turns out, as you get older, you don’t actually figure anything out; you just don’t have any energy to care anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Girl math is crying for two hours and then realizing it wasn’t that deep.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

If you burned CDs for the car so your original copies wouldn’t get scratched, it’s time to schedule your colonoscopy.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Sleeping is nice, because you’re not actually dead and you’re not awake, so its a win-win situation.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

Accidentally turned my clocks back too far and ended up at a Wham concert.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

If I was on Love Island, I would get wasted and drown in the pool, altering the course of every contestant’s life forever.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

Being a social worker is crazy because those are literally my two least favorite things.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Alcohol and eye contact is a deadly combo.

Just shared via Slack:

Women will brag about their intuition, and then date a DJ.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Going viral on Instagram:

I’m an atheist, so if you send prayers, I’ll send thoughts.

Going viral on WeChat:

Yes, we absolutely can push our meeting to sometime after the new year, or mid-March, or the year after next, or never.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m an adult in the same way a tomato is a fruit.

Spotted on Discord:

What if babies had two umbilical cords and if you cut the wrong one, it exploded?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My middle finger salutes you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Boys are disgusting. Can’t believe I like these things.

My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨