Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

Who called it a heatwave and not a temperature tantrum?

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

Had a shower and put on clean pajamas. It was a productive day.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡ͺ has shared:

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡¦ has shared:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡¬ has bookmarked:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡± has viewed:

What are some beginner pieces of information for somebody just getting into knowledge?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡³ has shared:

Good morning to everyone who still believes what they see with their own two eyes.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡© has copied:

I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡¦ has shared:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,717

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via Slack:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Spotted on Snapchat:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Just landed via WeChat:

My favorite pastime is looking for meaning where there is none.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Trending via Facebook:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I accidentally poured vodka on my orange juice this morning. Twice.

Spotted on TikTok:

Shampoo companies need to be clearer when they say β€œrepairs damage”. I cancelled my therapy for nothing.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

Going viral on Reddit:

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Witty text highlighting how algorithms secretly know your guilty pleasures.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
When the algorithm knows your deepest secrets better than you do! πŸ•πŸ€–πŸ‘€

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going πŸ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Threads this month:

Common sense isn’t a gift. It’s a punishment, because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

42 shares on X this month:

If I delete a tweet, I should disappear with it.

25 shares on Discord this month:

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

48 shares on Slack this month:

Never wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

22 shares on TikTok this month:

And to my children I leave my collection of tote bags and gift bags.

29 shares on X this month:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

41 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Mom, how did we get so rich?” your father said, “Thanks, nothing from my end,” on thousands of important Zoom meetings.

58 shares on X this month:

I always take two stairs at a time, that way if I fall, it’s only half the distance.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

When I was a kid, there were two ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Note to self: just because it’s in the map app’s directions, doesn’t mean the road is paved.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

22 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The sexual orientation where you’re attracted to both and men and women but they’re not attracted to you is called Bi-yourself.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Went to the grocery store hungry. I didn’t need to pay rent this month anyway.

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

6 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ή has copied:

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

So cool that avocados come with those little wooden balls inside, I think I have collected the whole set.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡» has bookmarked:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here pumping gas until the dollar amount ends with 0.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡Ί has copied:

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¨ has shared:

I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡» has shared:

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡² has shared:

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡§ has copied:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

I’m not even a 2nd choice, I’m like an 8th choice, sometimes a 10th.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ύ has downloaded:

My attempts to purge my possessions always seem to result in me rediscovering that I have lots of nice things, after which I lie happily on my hoard like a dragon.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Broadcasted on Discord:

This year for Thanksgiving, I’ll probably bring what I brought last year… shame upon the family.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

That’s just brainslop. You only came up with that by thinking.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Trending via Reddit:

My husband saw a rabbit in our yard eating grass and said β€œThat would be like sitting in a field of french fries.”

Just landed via YouTube:

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Trending via YouTube:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

Going viral on Reddit:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

Β© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❀️ in Sydney β˜€οΈπŸŒ΄