Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

He called me delusional, but I think he meant delicious.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Anyone who says there are no stupid questions is welcome to drop by my office. My colleagues will prove you wrong.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Dear Math, I don’t want to solve your problem, I have my own problems to solve.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Public transportation is great, but they should invent a type where it’s only me in the vehicle.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Just another day of not being hot and rich.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t need to bring anything to a knife fight, because I don’t go to knife fights.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Combining breakfast and lunch: Brunch. Combining wine and dinner: Winner.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

If I had a bf, I’d be a gf.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,262

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Welcome to your 40s. “I’m too old for this shit” is now your excuse and explanation for everything.

Spotted on Threads:

I just wanna buy $16 worth of a meme coin and sell it for $2.6M two weeks later.

Just shared via Slack:

If I meet you at a party and you instantly start asking about my job, you are subhuman to me.

Spotted on Messenger:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Going viral on X:

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

Just landed via TikTok:

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

Breaking via Threads:

If being hard on yourself worked, it would have worked by now!

Just shared via Snapchat:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Making waves on Threads:

Being alone is my favourite way of being.

Just shared via Reddit:

The world started without permission again.

The fact Head and Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called Knees and Toes, is disappointing.

The fact Head and Shoulders doesn’t have a body wash called Knees and Toes, is disappointing.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Running out of catchy names for body wash? Someone needs to toe the line! 🚿😂🦶

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Instagram this month:

I remember owning a mobile device as a kid, it was called my bike.

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

93 shares on Telegram this month:

Life is hard. It is harder if you are stupid.

74 shares on YouTube this month:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

11 shares on Snapchat this month:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

42 shares on WeChat this month:

Nutrition labels should include an “What if I ate the whole thing” section.

97 shares on Slack this month:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

It sucks that crazy people ruined wearing tinfoil hats for those of us that just did it for fashion purposes.

52 shares on Instagram this month:

I had too much to think last night.

21 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Yesterday I wore something from 5 years ago and it actually fit. So proud of myself. It was a scarf, but still, let’s be positive here.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Showing my barber a picture of a dinosaur.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,545

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Returning to Twitter is like coming back to a dysfunctional family.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

The goose: Canada’s most violent saxophone.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

No, babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

Y’all screenshot payment confirmations to make sure they don’t play with y’all too?

Making waves on Twitch:

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.

Just shared via Threads:

Girls really only want one simple thing; and that one thing is all of your attention.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Behind every beautiful woman is either tummy issues, low iron, or poor eyesight.

Just landed via TikTok:

If you ever find yourself as a houseguest for an extended period of time, here is the golden rule for success: invisible by day, charming by night.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

Making waves on Discord:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Making waves on Reddit:

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Just shared via X:

America’s national anthem should be changed to Welcome to the Jungle.

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