Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I have so much to offer. It’s all bad, but still.
  • There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.
  • Why read the room when you can leave the room?
  • One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.
  • You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.
  • If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.