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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, Guantanamo Bay.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

How do I un-know people?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

I don’t think fish should be allowed to eat other fish. I don’t know. Just seems weird. That’s like your coworker, dude.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? I don’t even know where I am right now.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

Every CVS has its own unique energy that’s powerful enough to exalt or destroy the individual.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Dec 12, 2025

3,779

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Just landed via Slack:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Broadcasted on Messenger:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Attention: will the owner of a small blue planet with tectonic plates please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating.

Trending via Messenger:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

1 month ago

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

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Commentary:
Just when you think you've reached the end of the bullshit, another chapter drops 🍂📖🔄🤦‍♂️

bullshit, challenges, frustration, humor, life, never, pass, persistence, place, reality, struggle, take, this too shall pass, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Don’t worry, baby, the back pain is because your wings are growing.

1 month ago
baby, back, back pain, growing, growth, humor, pain, reassurance, wing, wings, worry
Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

1 month ago
course, crush, delusion, going, humor, leave, love, reality, relationship, spouse, work
Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

1 month ago
appointment, dental, dentist, humor, joke, late, me, should, start, tell
I’m on this new diet where I don’t consume anything that talks to me before the first coffee.

1 month ago
anything, before, breakfast, coffee, conversation, diet, humor, i, me, morning, new, where
Hi there, I very much look forward to letting you down.

4 months ago
disappointment, expectation, forward, greeting, hi, humor, i, letting, much, sarcasm
Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

1 month ago
affection, bonding, break, children, family, hug, humor, parenting, things, time

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Dec 12, 2025

4,008

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

I will never fall victim to groupthink. I have perfectly unique opinions that no one else has, and they are the dumbest nonsense you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Sometimes I want to go back in time and punch myself in the face.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight. Now I pick up a fork and gain seven pounds.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Standing like a flamingo at my kitchen counter eating watermelon is such a vibe.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Doing an hour of self-care after 23 hours of self-destruction.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Broadcasted on Discord:

At some point in life, you graduate from Family Guy to American Dad.

Just landed via Pinterest:

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Spotted on Messenger:

Ho, ho, holy shit is Christmas stressful.

Shared recently on Facebook:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Seen just now on Facebook:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

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