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Oh, the classic toothpaste vs. drink battle – a timeless matchup indeed 🦷🚫🥤! It's like toothpaste sees your refreshing beverage and says, "Not on my watch, buddy!" 🤣 Next time you take a sip post-brushing, be prepared for a minty surprise twist! #ToothpasteVsDrinkBattle

beverage, care, comedy, dental, dental care, drink, drinking, humor, mishap, ruin, sure, toothpaste, unexpected

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

1 month ago
body, brain, humor, okay, sleep, sleepy, thinky, thoughts, time
At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

1 month ago
age, hours, humor, last, life, microsleep, rest, sleep
If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

1 month ago
confidence, cool, ear, good, humor, interviewer, job, magic, magic trick, quarter, think, trick, workplace
Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

1 month ago
adulthood, aging, bad, convince, eyesight, font, font size, going, humor, just, means, self-deception, size, small, too, trying, yourself
English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

1 month ago
confusion, drink, English, fake, food, humor, language, wordplay
Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

1 month ago
another, cocktail, date, draft, flirtation, gaze, God, humor, lit, lust, need, playful, romantic, sin, witty

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I’ve disappointed better people.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

The term “bisexual” is so confusing. Are you sexual twice a week or once every other week?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

I was dropped as an adult.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in new orc city?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

There are many people who don’t like me and I am one of them.

Spotted on TikTok:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

Spotted on Slack:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

Shared recently on Discord:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a cardiac surgeon in the middle of heart surgery.

Making waves on Reddit:

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Going bananas on Twitch:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

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Activity Log ✨

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

Making her wear those remote-controlled vibrating panties in public so I can inform her when I’m tired and want to leave the party.

Everybody in the world, stop fighting or no dessert.

My grandfather tried to warn them about the Titanic. He screamed and shouted about the iceberg and how the ship was going to sink, but all they did was throw him out of the theater.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Getting into male-dominated fields like falling asleep on the couch.

The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.

Hear me out: a streaming service that doesn’t keep increasing their prices and actually has movies you want to watch.

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Found a picture of me sitting on Santa’s lap. Hard to believe it’s been a whole year.

Just because the deodorant says 48 hrs, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

If you want to make your mother proud, make her my mother-in-law.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

So many people to disappoint, so little time.

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face.

Asking the birds outside my window if they know any Metallica.

My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

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Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Adulthood means trying to convince yourself that the font is just too small and that it isn’t your eyesight going bad.

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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