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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Voice messages. Just call, goddamnit!

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Cleaning your kid’s room will piss you off, cause why is my Airfryer in here?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Basically a lot of my problems boil down to me being really bad at waking up, and also really bad at going to sleep.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

“I’m at a point in my life where my favorite thing to do is nothing.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I just turned on my car’s seat warmer to keep my burrito warm in case you wondered what I was up to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,678

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Going viral on Slack:

Banks: You are broke, so we are going to charge you for being broke.

Freshly posted on X:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Making waves on X:

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m at the age when riding around town, I say, “When did they build that?”

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

Spotted on WeChat:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

1 month ago

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Commentary:
"When you pick up the 'snooze-inducer,' but the plot twists have other plans! 📚😂😴"

bedtime, book, boring, boring book, distraction, humor, interest, interesting, irony, most, reading, sleep, tried

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

1 month ago
complain, condemn, criticize, fool, humor, irony, self-awarenes
Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

1 month ago
accuse, brag, confidence, effort, ever, hard, humor, me, self-deprecation, too, trying
If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.

4 months ago
bird, early, early bird, face, full, hiking, humor, learned, nature, outdoor, spiderweb, thing
Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

1 day ago
30s, compliment, congrats, dating, decision making, humor, panic, person, pick, relationship, should, unmarried, wrong
I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

1 month ago
antidepressant, baby, baby name, humor, i, irony, later, learn, mom, name, naming, new, new mom, only, parenting, pick, try, unique, unique name, wonder
What doesn’t kill you gives you a twisted, dark sense of humor.

1 month ago
adversity, dark, dark humor, humor, kill, resilience, sense, survival, twisted, wit

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Nothing is more awkward than trying to tell an online joke to offline people.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

An escape room, but it’s just your high school reunion.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I wonder what John Connor thinks now that everyone is embracing AI.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Going viral on Reddit:

When your electric toothbrush dies, it becomes a regular toothbrush. Don’t freak out. Just calm down and remember your training.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’m not scared of love, I’m scared of insufficient cash.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

What doesn’t kill you gives you a twisted, dark sense of humor.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Imagine hating me and im just at my desk spinning reeaaally fast in my office chair.

Thank you two-step authentication codes that expire after 60 seconds for providing Mission Impossible-type drama into my mundane suburban existence.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

wearing no bra and oversized clothes is self-care at its finest

Men can stay up til 2 a.m., wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day, everything will work out. It’s called being a man.

Asking “how’s the job hunt going?” is a lot like asking “did you come?” I promise you, you’d hear if there was any success.

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Do people who love escape rooms not know about IKEA?

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

Today, I used a wire I’ve kept in my box of cables since 2011. Please applaud.

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

Nicknamed my iPhone Lois Lane because it doesn’t recognize me without my glasses on either.

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

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Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

If it’s one thing we’ve learned hiking, it’s the early bird that gets the face full of spiderwebs.

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

What doesn’t kill you gives you a twisted, dark sense of humor.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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