Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

The elder Zoomer speaks of the Wii with reverence.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

I have read the room and decided to be illiterate.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

If someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll let you know. Get rid of those people.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

The subtle art of letting yourself go crazy once in a while.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Sorry, I’m late. I was trying to convince a bathroom hand dryer that I exist.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,760

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Hanging out with your parents as an adult is so interesting, cause it’s like, “Oh, so that’s why I’m like this.”

Just shared via YouTube:

Taking Adderall to use the calculator app.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

Going viral on Reddit:

I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Making waves on Instagram:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Just landed via YouTube:

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

1 month ago

Playful quote about aspiring influencers, humorously questioning social media fame and content creation.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Sign me up for the 'Professional Nodder' position!🙋‍♂️💼 Just imagine getting paid to perfect the art of nodding approvingly in front of someone else's hard work. Who needs originality anyway when you've got 2M followers nodding along with you?😂👏 #NoddingInfluence"

commentary, content, followers, front, humor, i, influencer, just, media, nodding, satire, sign, social, social media, standing, thing, where, whole

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Discord this month:

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

18 shares on Discord this month:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

The idea that wisdom teeth are just some random glitch that God forgot to patch, so now we have to pull them out with modern technology, is retarded.

52 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to middle age: your chin looks lonely; here’s another one.

74 shares on Discord this month:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

76 shares on Facebook this month:

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

Stop trying to be liked by everybody. You don’t even like everybody.

14 shares on Discord this month:

The only thing worse than children talking about sex is adults talking about politics.

54 shares on Slack this month:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I deleted Google when I met you because the search was over.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

When you’re using Grok, the A in Al just stands for Adolf.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish my wife’s sighs came with subtitles.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Training a cat is very easy. After a few days, you do what she wants.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I could throw tomatoes at comments.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,732

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Watching women’s tennis and getting angry at the net. We shouldn’t put needless obstacles in the way of women.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Vaping always looked dumb. It looks like you’re smoking a kazoo, and now the lead poisoning is the cherry on top.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If I meet you at a party and you instantly start asking about my job, you are subhuman to me.

Breaking via Pinterest:

McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Due to personal reasons, I won’t be dropping it like it’s hot anymore.

Making waves on Messenger:

I wish my Fitbit could track all the steps I’ve taken trying to find where I put it.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Just shared via TikTok:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Going viral on X:

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

Live now on X:

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

Seen just now on Slack:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Making waves on X:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

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