Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I miss when 1K was a lot of money.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

A foghorn but for people who can’t see through their own bullshit.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Don’t listen to them, little password. You are strong.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

It is so weird that every single one of us is going to die, and we are not nicer to each other.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Going viral on YouTube:

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

Just landed via Discord:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Trending via Threads:

Dear Santa, Money!

Going viral on YouTube:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When adulthood slaps you with a rent check, and suddenly that "haunted" complex looks like a castle 🏚️👉🏰 #MillennialStruggles 😅💸

afford, affordability, apartment, being, childhood, complex, financial, financial struggle, finding, housing, kid, live, living, living situation, means, millennial, nostalgia, shady, situation, struggle, thought

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

0

2 months ago

captcha, humanity, humor, identity, irony, own, prove, technology
I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

0

2 months ago

bag, candy, commentary, humor, i, joke, M&M, social, social commentary, woke, wordplay
I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

0

2 months ago

bottle, gym, holder, i, just, put, saw, someone, treadmill, water
Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

0

2 months ago

chaos, children, dish, dish towel, expectations, hanging, hell, household, humor, neatness, oh, parenting, towel
I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

0

2 months ago

brain, dishrag, health, humor, i, mental, mental health, need, someone, thoughts, wring
Touch my butt, not my coffee.

0

2 months ago

boundary, butt, cheek, coffee, humor, personal, personal space, playful, space, touch

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Twitch this month:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

40 shares on Discord this month:

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

Adulting is only fun when you have the funds.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

I lied, there’s no sex. Stand over there and tell me if this painting I’m hanging is straight.

77 shares on Discord this month:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

93 shares on X this month:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, if you could take some stuffing out of the midsection and give it a little forehead kiss, that would be great.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

I might not put the sparkle in your eyes, but I’ll definitely put the “WTF” wrinkles in your forehead.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Needs to be a Google Maps setting where you can ask them not to make you take a left across four lanes of oncoming traffic.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just sitting on the couch googling if penguins have knees.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

The difference between coffee and your opinion is that I asked for coffee.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I am not in a good place, geographically.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

French fries are like the lifeboats on the Titanic. They never give you enough.

Going viral on YouTube:

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

Making waves on Facebook:

You can always tell when a man’s mustache is performative and not representative of his true spirit.

Trending via Twitch:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Shared recently on Messenger:

If you aren’t sleeping with me, then you’re sleeping against me.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Have your guardian angel call my guardian angel.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Trending via Snapchat:

Realizing this yogurt I’m eating is more active and cultured than I am.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Fellas, if your lady is mad, ask her if it’s because she’s put on some weight. That’ll calm her down.

Making waves on Messenger:

I need to figure out what I’m going to wear to the couch on New Year’s Eve.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

Touch my butt, not my coffee.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨