Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Blocking them on social media is so last season. I have to take it up a notch and cancel their favorite TV show. Revenge never looked so binge-worthy! 😏📺 #PettyGoals"

blocking, cancellation, cancelled, enough, entertainment, favorite, humor, i, media, need, people, revenge, show, social, social media, TV, TV Show

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I know sacrifice. I’m willing to pluck a few extra hairs to get to the white ones.

0

2 months ago

beauty, extra, hair, humor, i, know, pluck, sacrifice, self-care, white
Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

0

2 months ago

bus, character, comedy, everyone, humor, irony, main, main character, perspective, reality, self-importance, transportation
You ever liked a song so much you restart it before it even finishes?

0

3 months ago

before, enjoyment, even, ever, favorite, funny observation, habit, liked, much, music, observation, replay, restart, song
Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, convince, date, Godzilla, humor, idea, invite, monster, plus, plus one, relationship, rom-com, struggle, struggles, wedding
Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, bald, being, every, floating, humor, imagine, joke, just, mirror, time, toupée, vampire, walk
“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioning, comfort, conditioning, good, health, humor, indoor, indoors, just, mental, mental health, mentally, place, relaxation, right

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Instagram this month:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

17 shares on TikTok this month:

The worst part about waking up is all the remembering.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

27 shares on X this month:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My milkshakes bring all the bots to the yard.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

48 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Lord of the Rings is a story about a brave little Hobbit on a mission to destroy a ring and save the world, and his annoying friend Frodo.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

He called me delusional, but I think he meant delicious.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

With great power comes a huge electric bill.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

If I was a fish, I’d be smoking all the seaweed.

Trending via Instagram:

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

Just landed via Threads:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Breaking via Messenger:

Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

Trending via TikTok:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Just landed via Messenger:

To be clear, when I said I was looking for “growth,” I meant in salary, not in workload and stress levels.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I’ve got midlife crises older than you.

Spotted on Reddit:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I know sacrifice. I’m willing to pluck a few extra hairs to get to the white ones.

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

You ever liked a song so much you restart it before it even finishes?

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Imagine being a bald vampire and every time you walk by a mirror your toupée is just floating.

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨