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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Roses are pink. I need a drink.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

As long as I can dip something in something, I’m happy.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Ghosting is disrespectful unless it’s me doing it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

My favorite hobby is withering away.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Christmas adverts: “Eat all the food! Drink all the drink! Spoil yourself! It’s Christmas!” New year adverts: “Look at what you’ve done to yourself, you fat sack of shit!”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,672

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

Live now on Facebook:

The Christmas tree I’ve had up all year makes a lot more sense now.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Tired of my landlord depending on my rent. Bro, get a job.

Just shared via Facebook:

You lose some, you lose some more.

Just shared via Facebook:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Spotted on Threads:

The ‘b’ in ‘subtle’ totally is.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Do you ever find yourself just thinkin’ about bread?

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

1 month ago

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Commentary:
I'm convinced cats have an alarm clock labeled "human disturbance" ⏰😹🐾

back, behavior, cat, cats, culture, love, pet, pet behavior, sleep, wake, wake up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

1 month ago
adventure, bed, bed rot, chill, chill time, comfort, dating, day, doing, doing nothing, favorite, hiking, introvert, just, lazy, lazy day, looking, no adventure, nothing, relaxation, rot, someone, thing, time
Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

1 month ago
color, confusion, fruit, humor, logic, orange, question, wordplay
When I said you had a “serial killer face” I had meant it as a compliment. Like, you look like you are very ambitious is what I meant.

2 months ago
ambitious, appearance, compliment, face, humor, i, irony, killer, meant, personality, serial, serial killer
I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

1 month ago
always, best, humor, i, irony, self-reflection, shouldn’t, things
I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

4 months ago
bro, brush, casual, cat, humor, i, whatever
I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

1 month ago
baby, diet, eat, ethics, food, fruit, fruitarian, humor, i, idea, just, love, morality, spinach, vegetarianism

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Are you there, bathroom walls, ceiling, floor, mirror, sink, and towels? It’s me, the kids toothpaste.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

“You’ve changed!” Yeah, I don’t like you.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

“I’ve tasted going back to an ex, and I’ve tasted trying to fix a relationship before it breaks. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 10 p.m.”

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Spotted on Instagram:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here looking at soup recipes.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

Trending via Discord:

My doubters will become my grouters when I remodel the bathroom of success.

Seen just now on Slack:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Making waves on Instagram:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

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Activity Log ✨

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

When I said you had a “serial killer face” I had meant it as a compliment. Like, you look like you are very ambitious is what I meant.

I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’90s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the garage.

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Not my circus, but I’ve grown quite fond of its monkeys.

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

My morning routine is basically just me convincing myself not to go back to bed.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Occupation: the ugly friend!

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

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Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

When I said you had a “serial killer face” I had meant it as a compliment. Like, you look like you are very ambitious is what I meant.

I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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