Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Don't procrastinate expressing yourself! 🕰️ Let your loved ones know how you feel before it's too late, or your final gesture might lack the impact you were going for! 🖕😂 #CommunicateNowOrForeverHoldYourPeace"

advice, bed, death, death bed, expression, feel, feelings, finger, humor, know, let, life, life advice, middle, middle finger, raise, regret, too, wait

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

0

2 months ago

change, changing, funny observation, humor, layout, observation, rap, songs, stores
At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

0

2 months ago

appointment, blood, blood pressure, doctor, end, humor, irony, medical, own, pressure, self-care
The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

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2 months ago

anything, ask, attitude, audacity, daily, daily struggle, demand, humor, life, me, motivation, procrastination, sarcasm, sheer, struggle, today
“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

0

2 months ago

eat, food, friends, fry, humor, just, mine, relationship, sharing, yours
Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

0

4 months ago

apocalypse, Facebook, four, horseman, horsemen, humor, Instagram, joke, maybe, media, social, social media, TikTok, Twitter
I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

0

2 months ago

adventure, all inclusive, desperation, escape, humor, ID, inclusive, jurassic, Jurassic Park, park, point, spend, theme, theme park, travel, vacation, week

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

Spiders have the whole world to explore but still try to come up in my house.

64 shares on Instagram this month:

I made some bad choices in life, but I never bought a pair of Crocs.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

62 shares on X this month:

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

30 shares on Threads this month:

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

72 shares on Telegram this month:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

14 shares on Slack this month:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

Forgot my glasses, so I’m pointing at a random spot on the menu and hoping for the best.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

“Because my hair is not done” is a very valid reason to decline an outing.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

I hope I find $10,000 on the floor later.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Be the reason someone burns sage.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Telegram:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Just shared via Twitch:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Going bananas on Discord:

I don’t get it when people say they are only a “little” angry, I am either not mad or will kill you.

Spotted on Twitch:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

Trending via Snapchat:

To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”

Spotted on Messenger:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I caught your husband cheating on you at an Alanis concert, and thought you, you, you oughta know.

Shared recently on Telegram:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

Maybe the four horsemen of the apocalypse are Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨