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Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

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You have to stay up as needlessly late as possible to make the next day as horrible and hard as possible.

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Not being filthy rich is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

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Balloons are so weird. “Happy birthday, here’s a plastic sack of my breath.”

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I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

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Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

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Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

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15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

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Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Giant-sized bag of candy: I’m resealable. Me: That won’t be necessary.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If they cancel the Simpsons, we will no longer be able to see into the future.

Seen just now on Discord:

If you feel fat and sad just know it’s someone out there fatter than you.

Broadcasted on X:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” is now 40 years old. If you have an earworm now, you also have back pain.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

Home » Funny Anonymous Quotes

Funny anonymous quotes

New funny anonymous quotes 👇

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

2 months ago

anonymous, anonymous gift, charity, gift, gift giving, give, giving, know, money, people, person, philanthropy, post, rich, rich person, should, website, where, wish, wishes

All funny anonymous quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Everyone is getting idioter.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Misses Claus only married Santa because of his big sack.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

Just landed via X:

Mothers will invent chores just to be mad you’re not doing them too.

Seen just now on YouTube:

At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

Live now on Discord:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Seen just now on Slack:

The problem with believing that nothing matters except you, is that eventually everyone will just leave you alone to take extra special care of yourself.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

The best way to reach me is with intelligence and humor.

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Funny anonymous quotes

New funny anonymous quotes 👇

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

All funny anonymous quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

I have friends in high places (birds).

I am single, please disturb me!

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

This year has been the perfect blend of me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.

People who accuse me of delusions of grandeur, obviously don’t worship me enough.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

If snails are so slow, why don’t we ever see them coming? It’s just BAM, there’s a snail.

Sorry, but if you’re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, you’re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if you’re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, I’m thinking enemy.

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

I’m not religious but I know there’s a hell because Monopoly exists.

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