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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

It should be socially acceptable to just face the wall at a party when you need a break from talking.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Getting left on read really gives me perspective on what Nigerian princes go through.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Best lie you heard was eat all your food so you can be big and strong. Now look at you. Just big.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

I always set two alarms, one for “Good Intentions Me” and one for “The Real Me”

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

This is my emotional support online shopping cart.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

779 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,941

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,941

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I commented to a friend that I didn’t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Making waves on WeChat:

FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

Shared recently on Instagram:

When you’re dead, you don’t know that you’re dead. But it’s hard for those around you. It’s the same when you’re stupid.

Trending via Facebook:

Oh good. Another day.

Making waves on Telegram:

Here’s your daily reminder to not forget about Dre.

Spotted on Messenger:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Sure the Lego botanical sets are great but dusting them is another story.

Going viral on YouTube:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Just shared via Messenger:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

779 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,941

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,941

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,426

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Couldn’t afford a man cave. Had to settle for a gazebro.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

Spotted on WeChat:

You can never really “own” earbuds. You just have to appreciate the time you had together.

Just landed via Reddit:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

Just shared via WeChat:

Some people get weird as they get older. Not me, though. I’ve always been weird.

Making waves on Reddit:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Shared recently on WeChat:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

Just shared via WeChat:

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

Just shared via Messenger:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Reported on Snapchat:

You only live once and thank God for that.

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