Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

The more stupid the views, the harder it is to talk people out of them.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

You could be having a nice day and then somebody your own age says they bought a house.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Girls want a bad boy to fix. Boys want a good girl to corrupt. Me? I just want a rumbustious monkey as a butler.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

I always sit in the middle stall so I have a bathroom buddy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,466

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Just shared via Messenger:

Flex on your kids by asking “are we there yet?” before they do.

Making waves on Discord:

Good morning to everyone except myself cause I wish I was still asleep.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Breaking via Threads:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

Just landed via Discord:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

“Easy like Sunday morning” is something people with no kids say.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Just shared via Reddit:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Funny construct quotes

Funny construct quotes 🛠️😂 bring a lighthearted twist to the world of building, design, and all things construction! Whether you’re a pro on site or just love clever puns about hard hats and hammer time, these witty lines will nail your day with laughter. Ready to build some smiles and lay down a foundation of fun? Let’s get cracking with humor that’s as solid as concrete! 🚧🤣

New funny construct quotes 👇

All funny construct quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Bye, have a great day, I’ll see you after school”, I tell the orange in my kid’s lunch.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

Smart people are like huskies. If you don’t give them an interesting problem, they become an interesting problem.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

If it’s a ghost ship, why does it have to be on water?

21 shares on Reddit this month:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Men will ask you zero questions about yourself, and then say they never met anybody like you.

60 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m 27 and a half. I should be on my first divorce by now.

60 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

28 shares on Twitch this month:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Leaving your house and returning back safely is such an underrated blessing.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I remember when Britain used to be so rich, you’d be embarrassed to go into a Lidl or Aldi.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Vegan zombies be like: GRAINS!

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Living in your parent’s house is free because you pay with your soul.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

She’s the kind of beautiful that makes me do 40 push-ups in my room at 3am.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,410

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

How is this the same brain that used to remember everybody’s phone numbers?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

College is literally just you, your laptop, and your water bottle against the world.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

A driver that delivers Indian food is called a curryer.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Trending via LinkedIn:

I am so tired ever my tiredness is tired.

Trending via X:

Flirting is easy until it’s someone you actually like.

Trending via Reddit:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

Making waves on WeChat:

There is a giant spider on my dash so I’m going to have to buy a new car now.

Breaking via Telegram:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

Just shared via Facebook:

Your nose is in the middle of your face because it is the scenter.

Making waves on Facebook:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

Going viral on Twitch:

I miss when my hardest decision was Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴