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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I’m bad at being sad. Three mins later, I’m making jokes about my situation.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

Trending via WhatsApp:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I love when my grandma texts me — because I know it took her an hour.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

Reported on Snapchat:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The dumbest person you know is being told, “You’re absolutely right!” by ChatGPT.

Going viral on Reddit:

If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do.

Making waves on Snapchat:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My favorite hobby is withering away.

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Funny debating quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Why did they call it painting your toenails and not graffeeti?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Work meetings would be a lot more fun if they took place in a giant IKEA ball pit.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Just bought 4 pounds of cherries like I’m in some math problem.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Google Maps should not count towards my screen time. I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m disoriented.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

My showers take so long because I always hold a shower concert.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

It’s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Reported on WeChat:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

Just shared via Slack:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Making waves on Pinterest:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Going viral on LinkedIn:

On average, my daily actions demonstrate I’m probably good at something else.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

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