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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

I’m afraid that AI will quickly realize that the biggest problem on Earth is humans – and then solve the problem.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

It was so hot today, I thought I was going to be cremated.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I woke up alive again.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

If you wear glasses, we expect a lot from you academically, especially if your glasses have a rope.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

4,023

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

What I’m trying to say is, “Hello, here’s my entire heart and all of my devotion.”

Seen just now on YouTube:

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next.

Trending via Messenger:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Just shared via Slack:

Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

Making waves on Pinterest:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Trending via X:

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Breaking via Reddit:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Making waves on Slack:

Just got emotional imagining a worm emerging from its cocoon as a dragonfly and then got even more emotional remembering that’s not what they do.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I’m not bothered if you don’t like me, awesomeness isn’t for everyone.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,762

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Apparently, telling your friends not to stress about their wedding because “it’s your first marriage” is not the right thing to say.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I don’t get why banks tie pens with strings. We trust them with money, but they can’t trust us with a single pen.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

At the gym, everyone thinks exclusively about how little weight I can lift and how quickly I’m out of breath, because the world revolves around me.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Female friendship is all about taking turns being insane. First, one of you is crazy, and the other has to counterbalance by being normal. Then, thirty minutes later, you get to trade.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Naps are like gambling for the tired. You either wake up refreshed or too late to lots of angry texts.

Making waves on Telegram:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Trending via Pinterest:

I don’t understand baby oil. What are we greasing up all those babies for?

Breaking via Snapchat:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Making waves on Instagram:

I would never put up a lost dog poster. I’m not letting the whole neighborhood know I fumbled.

Live now on Threads:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

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