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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Having to pay to read scientific and scholarly articles is a really disgusting and pathetic practice.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not exhausted, you’re just awake. Have a nice day.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

If Dracula had a cat, she’d be the one sleeping in the coffin.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Deleted all my dating apps. I’m ready to find the love of my life in World of Warcraft.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

How do you text “okay” but in the rudest way possible?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m surviving motherhood, one teenage meltdown at a time.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Live now on WhatsApp:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

Freshly posted on X:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Broadcasted on Discord:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Funny film character quotes

New funny film character quotes 👇

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

6 days ago

actor, actor switch, benoit, Benoit Blanc, best, blanc, bond, celebrity, character, comedy, craig, daniel, Daniel Craig, ever, film, film character, happen, humor, james, James Bond, leaving, movie, movie role, role, switch, things

All funny film character quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on TikTok this month:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

54 shares on Slack this month:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

Since I started following the wisdom of ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu, my life has been so much better…

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m done with self-care. Time to learn some spells.

55 shares on WeChat this month:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

67 shares on Slack this month:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

96 shares on Slack this month:

Best time to reach me is when I’m at work. Don’t bother me when I’m at home.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

Imagine if you spent all your time studying, actually studying.

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Guilty pleasure? Why would I ever feel guilty about pleasure.

27 shares on Twitch this month:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Some people still fail to understand that the boot still has no problem crushing you, even if you lick it clean.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

If I honk at this person, maybe it will make them a better person.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I wish I could throw tomatoes at comments.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Too shy for influencing. Too dumb for crypto. Too honest for a scam. Too lazy for 9-5. How can I make money?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

If elves make shoes, cookies, and toys, why don’t we put them in charge of more stuff?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

‘I love reading!’ says the woman who loves owning books.

Live now on Facebook:

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Statistically speaking, on average, a person has two arms, two legs, one testicle, and one ovary.

Just landed via X:

My five-year plan is to just see what happens.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I have to stand in the shower about this.

Spotted on YouTube:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Apparently I’m the reason why I never have any money. I am shocked!

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

Shared recently on Telegram:

My spirit animal is that one bird that knocks itself unconscious, flying into windows.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny film character quotes

New funny film character quotes 👇

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

All funny film character quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨