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Funny fishnet quotes

  • Cheating on a partner should affect your credit score.

    Commentary:
    “Breaking hearts should tank your FICO! 💔📉 #RelationshipCreditScore”

  • Having a low quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like my camera’s doing a better job at witness protection than the FBI! 📷🤦‍♂️😂”

  • If I were a mouse, I’d say things like “cheesed to meet you”.

    Commentary:
    “That’s the kind of cheddar that’ll have everyone grinning like a mouse in a cheese factory! 🧀😄🐭”

  • It’s so hot, I just saw a squirrel fanning its nuts.

    Commentary:
    “That’s nutty! 🌰😂 When even the squirrels start waving tiny fans, you know it’s time for some ice cream!” 🍦💨

  • When I like a song, I repeat it until the artist comes out and ask for water.

    Commentary:
    “When I find a jam, I’m on repeat till the artist sends a thirst trap 😅🎶💧”

  • When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

    Commentary:
    “Row, row, row my brain gently down the stream of confusion! 🚣‍♂️😂 #ExcelExpertInTheMaking”

  • You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

    Commentary:
    “Sure, but let’s keep it eco-friendly and opt for biodegradable romance instead! 😄♻️🔥”

  • I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

    Commentary:
    “Why be wrong when I can be right 24/7? Just ask me! 😄🗣️📚 #SelfProclaimedExpert”

  • You can’t have everything… where would you put it?”

    Commentary:
    “True! My closet is already a black hole for all my missing socks! 🧦🕳️😂”

  • If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

    Commentary:
    “Channeling my inner ‘aimbird’ 🎯🦜… watch out below! 💩😆”

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