Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

I grew up ugly, so I had to be funny, and then got hot in my twenties, so that’s how I became perfect.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean I’m ready to do things.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

This is not an empty room, this is a very successful anti-party.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

I hate being around people who mistake my childlike wonder as naivety or weakness. I am simply a war general who loves to giggle.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

I asked Tom Hanks for his autograph, but all he wrote was thanks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,677

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

A little mystery is the sweetest seduction.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Making waves on Messenger:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Breaking via Slack:

Know what goes good with beer? Another one.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I have a bit of an inferiority complex. But it’s not a very good one.

Going viral on Reddit:

My favorite color is money.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Trending via Slack:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

Funny fluency quotes

New funny fluency quotes 👇

I love people who are fluent in Spongebob references.

0

2 months ago

communication, fandom, fluency, humor, i, love, people, reference, references, Spongebob

Someone from 🇧🇧 has recently copied this quote.

77 shares on Instagram this month.
Preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie.

0

3 months ago

apocalypse, fluency, humor, language, preparation, survival, zombie

Someone from 🇳🇬 has recently bookmarked this quote.

115 shares on WeChat this month.
“I’m fluent in creating worst-case scenarios in my head.”

0

4 months ago

anxiety, creating, fluency, head, humor, imagination, overthinking, scenario, self-awareness, worst-case, worst-case scenario

Someone from 🇸🇲 has recently bookmarked this quote.

18 shares on Reddit this month.

All funny fluency quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

12 shares on Discord this month:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone who dramatically ‘quits’ social media is back in 48 hours like it was just a trial separation.

53 shares on Snapchat this month:

Please don’t celebrate April Fool’s day if you’re not a fool. My culture is not your costume.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m the kind of crazy you weren’t warned about because no one knew this level existed.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

I am half agony, half hope.

40 shares on WeChat this month:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Ummmm, no, I don’t watch ‘Instagram Reels.’ I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Breaking News: Jenny on Facebook is having salad for dinner tonight.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Much like lasagna, I’m just held together by cheese at this point.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

First rule of cleaning while listening to music: the toilet brush is never the microphone. Never!

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Really just want to meet someone who knows what songs not to talk over.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Going viral on Threads:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Seen just now on Discord:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Breaking via Reddit:

Have we checked all food to see if exploding it makes it into something better or did we just stop with corn?

Freshly posted on Threads:

I always do my best sleeping in the 10 minutes before my alarm goes off.

Seen just now on Instagram:

If you go by “Toni,” I always think your full name is Rigatoni.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Just shared via YouTube:

Dear deodorant manufacturers, please stop writing “72h” on your products. There are people who believe that. And they sit next to me on the bus. Always. All of them!

Just shared via Twitch:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny fluency quotes

New funny fluency quotes 👇

I love people who are fluent in Spongebob references.

Preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie.

“I’m fluent in creating worst-case scenarios in my head.”

All funny fluency quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨