Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Together, I can beat schizophrenia.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

My mood is currently on “shuffle”.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,724

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Just shared via Discord:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Live now on Facebook:

Can I come over and figure you out?

Trending via Reddit:

Maybe everyone can just pee outside from now on so I never have to clean the toilets again.

Just shared via Threads:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Just shared via X:

Tech bros are frequently wrong but never in doubt.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

Funny health concern quotes

New funny health concern quotes 👇

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

2 months ago

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All funny health concern quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Twitch this month:

Writing is so fun because you get to google things like “woman names”.

64 shares on Discord this month:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

If bugs could talk, they would probably say things like, “What the bug?”

64 shares on Threads this month:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

A big F*** YOU to people driving small cars and pulling deep into parking spaces so I think I have a spot until the last second.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

56 shares on X this month:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

“You handled that with such grace” are words that have never been spoken to me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I did not spend years turning the faucet off while I brushed my teeth, so corporations could ruin the environment with festering AI slop.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Being awake is the worst.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

You know how a dog tilts his head and looks confused when he hears a strange sound? Yeah, that’s how I feel when some people are talking.

Spotted on YouTube:

Live, laugh, leftovers.

Just shared via Facebook:

I’m not enjoying this slow-burn apocalypse. I need it over and done like a popular Netflix show.

Just shared via X:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

Seen just now on TikTok:

For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

Making waves on Discord:

I’m off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Going bananas on Reddit:

It’s just a matter of time until they add “syndrome” after my name.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny health concern quotes

New funny health concern quotes 👇

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

All funny health concern quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨