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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

I could tell by the way she was pouring gasoline on a pile of my clothes that the relationship had hit some turbulence.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

No one is more stressed than someone who has seen their potential and knows they aren’t living up to it.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Trending via Threads:

Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Making waves on Slack:

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

Trending via Telegram:

Good morning only to those who duel at dawn, drink at dusk, and haunt their lovers in between.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

Shared recently on Discord:

If it’s a ghost ship, why does it have to be on water?

Spotted on WeChat:

Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

Going viral on YouTube:

Airport beer at 6 a.m.? No problem. The airport is a lawless place that is free from judgment.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

30 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

I am such a fun person and so easy to get along with as long as the layout I have secretly imagined for the entire day goes exactly as I planned it without variation or interruption.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

My wallet is like an onion; opening it makes me cry.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

I like to be alone a lot; it’s nothing personal.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Trending via Reddit:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

First date idea: you rescue me out of the tree I got stuck in while looking through your windows.

Shared recently on Telegram:

A baby cow is called a calf because it’s half a cow. Half cow. Calf. No further questions.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed, and the other half don’t know how to do math.

Live now on Snapchat:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Reported on Snapchat:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Just landed via Telegram:

Yesterday I went to a fight and a baseball game broke out.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

Making waves on Threads:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

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