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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Adulthood is really discovering half your family is mentally ill.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

I like to keep my wife guessing by walking around the backyard carrying a ladder and a chainsaw.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Please pray for my husband, he’s struggling to find me.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I sent you a message telepathically and you didn’t respond. Are you mad at me?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

That uncontrollable urge to hurt myself and others when a film’s subtitles are slightly out of sync.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

The only warning I take seriously these days is when my cell phone battery is low.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2431 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,593

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,593

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

I love when I clean my whole apartment just to sit in it like a Victorian widow waiting for bad news.

Making waves on Facebook:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

Spotted on Twitch:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

Trending via Messenger:

If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.

Breaking via X:

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

Trending via WeChat:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I disagree with my politics.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2431 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,593

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,593

Updated

57 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Kitchen sex, because it might be your only chance of getting laid on an island this summer.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Not to brag but I am evidence of things unseen.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

If you put a pizza on top of a pizza, you have two pizzas. But if you stack two lasagnas, then you still have one lasagna.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

If Wonka had a spaghetti factory, I’d get sucked into a marinara river tube so fast.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I don’t understand why bugs come inside when they have a whole outside to themselves.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Some folks go to college to delay being a bum.

Making waves on YouTube:

I don’t go crazy. I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time.

Reported on Pinterest:

Doing nothing is hard. You never know when you are done.

Trending via WeChat:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Just landed via Twitch:

My toxic trait is optimism.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

“You’re so quick to cut someone off!” God forbid a girl actually has self-respect.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Jesus died for your sins. If you don’t sin then he died for nothing!

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