Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Jobs are so clingy. Why do you need to see me 40 hours a week?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Being excited to get in bed really is a different level of adulting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,257

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Hey (with the intention of getting ice cream).

Making waves on TikTok:

In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

Shared recently on Discord:

No one ever talks about the 6th love language (being annoying).

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Shared recently on Messenger:

The sound of a buzzing fly is enough to ruin my whole mood.

Live now on Facebook:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Live now on LinkedIn:

Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because it’s just such a joy to be alive.

Funny professional help quotes

Funny professional help quotes bring a much-needed dose of humor to the workplace 😄💼 Whether you’re tackling tricky projects or navigating office chaos, these witty gems remind us that laughter is the best productivity hack 😂✨ Ready to brighten your workday and share some smiles with colleagues? Let’s dive into the lighter side of professional advice and make helping out feel a whole lot more fun! 🚀🎉

New funny professional help quotes 👇

All funny professional help quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t know how to knit, so I made you a tinfoil hat.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

Winnie the Pooh had the right idea in this goddam heat. Crop top with his honey pot facing the world.

97 shares on Pinterest this month:

Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

38 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It doesn’t matter how old you are, when it starts thundering and lightning, you go and sit at the window to watch.

52 shares on Threads this month:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you say something while exhaling smoke, it is 10 times more profound.

67 shares on WeChat this month:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m so old, I still drink my coffee at home in the morning. From a real cup.

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

Wake up, the thinking isn’t going to overthink itself.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I am absolutely unstoppable, unless it’s a bit rainy.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

This post is highly top-secret. You need to forget that you’ve seen it immediately.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My grandfather tried to warn them about the Titanic. He screamed and shouted about the iceberg and how the ship was going to sink, but all they did was throw him out of the theater.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,363

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

It’s perfectly normal if you want to watch an actor’s entire filmography because you find them attractive. Don’t let anyone stop you.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

The hottest part of sex is when I take off my glasses and put them in a safe place.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I just need my friends to know I would do absolutely anything for them, except reply to their message.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

How long are you allowed to hide in the bathroom during family visits?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Trending via Twitch:

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Where does everyone go to get kisses? I haven’t figured this out yet.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I don’t hold grudges. I just remember facts very aggressively.

Just shared via Instagram:

The feminine urge to turn you on and not do anything about it.

Spotted on Instagram:

Time travel is all well and good, but I feel so stupid right now. None of them have the mustache. No way to tell which baby is Hitler.

Spotted on Twitch:

Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

Shared recently on Twitch:

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

Making waves on Threads:

There are so many people going to hell. I’m thinking of investing in some property there.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴