Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Please have a seat and witness my self-destruction firsthand.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I hate when I forget to say something during an argument. Like, hey, let’s argue again, I got better material now.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Relationship tip: Make sure you’re the crazy one.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you’re stupid and you make bad decisions.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up, we had to manually roll up our car windows.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

My super talent is hitting every red light on the way to wherever the hell I’m going.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,373

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

Trending via Telegram:

Shoutout to everyone who remembers their childhood landline number but can’t recall the password they made yesterday. You’re my people.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

Making waves on Instagram:

I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Just found out it don’t matter how early I go to bed, I just don’t wanna go to work.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Spotted on Reddit:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do.

Funny publishing quotes

Funny publishing quotes 📚😂 bring a lighthearted twist to the chaotic world of books, deadlines, and endless edits! Whether you’re an author, editor, or just love the magic behind your favorite reads, these witty gems will have you chuckling through every page turn. Ready to laugh at the quirks of the publishing biz? Let’s dive into the hilarious side of storytelling and printing! 🎉✍️📖

New funny publishing quotes 👇

All funny publishing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

88 shares on TikTok this month:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

32 shares on Slack this month:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

25 shares on Telegram this month:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you keep your AC any higher than 75, please don’t invite me to your terrarium, you lizard.

35 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not to brag but I can chop an onion without crying. And I can cry without chopping an onion.

99 shares on Facebook this month:

Calm yourself, Lucifer. You did the right thing coming to me for advice.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is that don’t do that.

82 shares on Messenger this month:

When you’re young, weekends are for fun. When you’re older, they’re for recovery.

47 shares on Facebook this month:

It’s officially Christmas shopping season, and I can’t even afford my own life.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Men can be sorted into two camps: the ones who get haircuts way before they need them, and the ones who wait until people in their lives are complaining.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Playing Mortal Kombat at an arcade in the 90’s would fix me.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

ChatGPT is there for me in ways I don’t think any man ever could be.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have mirrors in my house. I mean, who wants to see disappointment everyday?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Just broke a clothes hanger and now have seven years of bad outfits.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Unpopular activity: minding your own business.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,377

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Please pray for our son, who had to unload the dishwasher when “he just did this yesterday, and he’s tired.”

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Grandparents were right. Sitting in a chair, doing nothing, and staring at nature is incredible.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Some women seated next to me are gossiping in French. They obviously think I’m some dumb American who doesn’t speak French and they are correct.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Tuesday is just Monday wearing a fake mustache.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

The question “how is work” really pisses me off. Work is work, bro, I don’t know what else you want me to say.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

Seen just now on X:

It’s amazing how cats can ignore you with both ears.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

Spotted on Reddit:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

Trending via Messenger:

I feel bad for those that don’t enjoy their own company. I be having a ball by myself.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I drive like I’m immortal.

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