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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to hell.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

SHEIN does entirely too much on their app. Feels like a freaking casino every time you open it.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I have absolutely no desire to stay in the loop.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

“Can’t wait till I get older” was the dumbest thing I ever said.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,431

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Just shared via Threads:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Going viral on Snapchat:

The web is the only place where you encourage strangers to follow you. What could possibly go wrong?

Shared recently on Messenger:

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

Making waves on Slack:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Just landed via Discord:

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Life is too short. Tell his mom what he did to you.

Spotted on Threads:

Back in the office this morning, trying to remember what I do for work.

Going viral on Telegram:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Funny rhapsody quotes

New funny rhapsody quotes 👇

An interviewer asked me how well I can perform under pressure; I said I’m much better at Bohemian Rhapsody.

5 days ago

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All funny rhapsody quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

Terrifying if taken literally—if these walls could talk.

48 shares on Instagram this month:

Text her when the moon looks pretty.

80 shares on Facebook this month:

My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck.

91 shares on Slack this month:

Thinking of you while I’m chopping onions.

69 shares on Slack this month:

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

89 shares on X this month:

I drive like I’m immortal.

43 shares on Messenger this month:

My Native American name would be Smokes Cigarettes.

36 shares on Twitch this month:

The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

35 shares on Slack this month:

Having an international law degree in this day and age must be what it feels like losing chess to a dog and getting robbed of $90,000 afterward.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Took a bunch of Ibuprofen to keep my posts from being too inflammatory.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Welcome to Netflix. We have everything but what you want to watch.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

No one told me adulthood would require this much multi-factor authentication.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Being drunk and liking every tweet without reading it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Missionary, so I can look him in the eyes and ask him why Ashley from work is texting him with heart eyes.

Breaking via Threads:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Going viral on Instagram:

Googling “effect vs affect” in an incognito window.

Trending via Pinterest:

I did not “try to rob a bank,” I just “aspired” to obtain more money.

Going viral on Discord:

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

Live now on Snapchat:

Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

Making waves on Threads:

That uncle who kept his distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense to you as you get older.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Rich people don’t put their couches against their wall. I moved my couch into the middle of the floor and still haven’t gotten rich. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong here.

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Funny rhapsody quotes

New funny rhapsody quotes 👇

An interviewer asked me how well I can perform under pressure; I said I’m much better at Bohemian Rhapsody.

All funny rhapsody quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨