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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I said when I retire, I would travel. I just didn’t expect it to be to the doctors.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

In search of someone who loves me as much as I love my snooze button.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I like it when someone feeds me their food without me asking. I feel like a part of my inner child heals.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Dating over 40 is like Hide and Seek but no one is looking for you.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

I just sneezed and farted at the same time. I think my body just took a screenshot.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Replying to all emails with “ya think?”.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I love when I get an email from a brand saying “we miss you!” with no coupon attached. Babe, a lot of people miss me, let’s be competitive here.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

4,011

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Going bananas on Slack:

I don’t know why everyone wants love like in the movies. A movie is only 2 hours.

Seen just now on TikTok:

The best part about your kids being sick is you get to see exactly how shitty you’re going to feel in 48 hours.

Live now on X:

Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Just shared via Slack:

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

This entire month could’ve been an email.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Home » Funny Running Late Quotes

Funny running late quotes

Funny running late quotes are the perfect way to turn those hectic moments into laughs 😂⏰ Whether you’re stuck in traffic, hit snooze one too many times, or just can’t find your keys, these witty lines will have you chuckling instead of stressing 🚶‍♂️💨 Life’s too short to be on time all the time—embrace the chaos with a smile! 😄✨

New funny running late quotes 👇

All funny running late quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,616

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Restaurants: put your phone down, live in the moment. Also, scan our QR code and browse our menu.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I thought I had more straws. Sorry, turns out that was the last one.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Just drank a big glass of water, and I regret to inform you, they might be right about hydration.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

They say an apple a day keeps a doctor away. But what do I need to eat to keep everyone away?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I never used to worry about death but now I’m terrified it will break my winning Wordle streak.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area.

Trending via TikTok:

Women’s skincare is so confusing. Am I supposed to look shiny and sweaty, or matte like cement?

Spotted on Threads:

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I feel sorry for Netflix era kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running away in an ad break, with the beckoning call of a sibling screaming “It’s ON!” to send you hurdling over furniture to get back in time.

Just shared via WeChat:

Can’t. Inventing new things to worry about.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If they cancel the Simpsons, we will no longer be able to see into the future.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

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