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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Someone at my job mentioned severance, and I was like, “Oh my God, I love that show,” and they said, “No, I’m about to get fired.”

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Just landed via WeChat:

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Spotted on TikTok:

Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

Trending via Instagram:

No pre-workout, just flashbacks of stuff I let slide.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

Seen just now on Threads:

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

Trending via Threads:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Seen just now on Discord:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Just landed via Slack:

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

Funny singer quotes

Funny singer quotes 🎤🎶 bring a hilarious twist to the world of music, turning backstage blunders and vocal quirks into pure comedy gold! Whether you’re a shower singer or a concert pro, these witty words will have you laughing out loud 🤣 while celebrating the highs and lows of hitting the right (or wrong) notes. Ready to giggle and groove? Let’s dive into some musical mischief! 🎵😂

New funny singer quotes 👇

All funny singer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Threads this month:

Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

98 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve been called a lot of things in my life, but nothing worse than being called on the phone.

74 shares on X this month:

I need to have a ginger ale about this.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

98 shares on Discord this month:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

35 shares on WeChat this month:

Facebook friends are like pens. You may have 150, but only 5 are writing.

27 shares on Threads this month:

The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

22 shares on Discord this month:

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

67 shares on Slack this month:

Two mysterious people live in my house. “Somebody” and “Nobody.” Somebody did it and nobody knows who.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t care for the term drug mule, why can’t it be a drug unicorn.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got a neighbor who’s really into morons. I should introduce her to you guys.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls want a bad boy to fix. Boys want a good girl to corrupt. Me? I just want a rumbustious monkey as a butler.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Bit strange that the same culture is responsible for both kissing and onion soup. You’d think they’d be incompatible.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,629

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

For once, I’d like to spiral into control.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I may forget what I opened the fridge for but I remember every time anyone has ever wronged me.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

You know you’re getting old when you get mad at some random car parked outside your house.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Wait, some of you are actually seeing for free? No glasses, no contacts? Wow!

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Sparkling water tastes like that feeling when your foot falls asleep.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Setting up a camera to go and pretend you just woke up from bed is another level of mental illness.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Going viral on Threads:

It’s always a huge relief when I’m reading a list of symptoms of a deadly disease, and it says unexplained weight loss.

Live now on Instagram:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Shared recently on Twitch:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

Breaking via Slack:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Trending via Snapchat:

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Spotted on Messenger:

Countries are just gangs with paperwork.

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