Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I never give second chances, just 10 and then goodbye.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance. Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Let’s just call ourselves divorced now and skip the stressful, expensive bit in the middle.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

They say water is the source of life, which is true because you can’t make coffee without water.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Trending via WeChat:

Co-worker: You look so unapproachable. Me: Yet, here you are.

Just landed via Facebook:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

Just shared via Messenger:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Not to brag but this cashier is checking me out.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

This simulation is no longer boring, since they replaced management.

Going viral on Slack:

When someone says they’re never going to talk to me again, I do the right thing and say thank you.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

Trending via Facebook:

“I’m currently not accepting new items on my to-do list.”

Funny stair quotes

Funny stair quotes bring a hilarious twist to those everyday steps we all climb! 😂 Whether you’re struggling up or bouncing down, these witty lines will have you giggling all the way to the top 🧗‍♂️✨. Perfect for sharing, laughing, and making even the tallest staircase feel a little lighter! 🎉👟 Ready to step into some serious fun? Let’s go! 🚶‍♀️🤣

New funny stair quotes 👇

All funny stair quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Threads this month:

I have a man cold. Goodbye, world. Tell my story.

39 shares on Reddit this month:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

100 shares on Twitch this month:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

96 shares on Discord this month:

The people that sing their heart out, but terribly, are my people.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

Jurassic Park came out decades ago, and now I feel like a fossil.

36 shares on X this month:

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, we are in a submarine.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag but I am evidence of things unseen.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

“This is a great weekend to clean out the garage,” according to my wife and other people who won’t be cleaning the garage.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

It doesn’t matter how old you are, when it starts thundering and lightning, you go and sit at the window to watch.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“Why do I feel like shit all the time?” I ask myself, while staring into the flashlight that tells me bad news.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,675

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

If you want to be sure that you never forget your wife’s birthday, just try forgetting it once.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side. My legs for always supporting me. And my fingers because I can always count on them.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Do you use AI, or is the AI using you?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

When people don’t drink coffee, it’s like, okay, but how do you solve the problem of being awake?

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Kinda rude that your reward for struggling through stuff is still dying at the end anyway.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Slack:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Live now on Snapchat:

I would really like to meet this “other candidate” who keeps taking all the jobs I’ve been applying to.

Going viral on X:

Accidentally punched myself in the face as I was getting dressed this morning, and I have to say, I deserved it.

Making waves on WeChat:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Going viral on Slack:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Seen just now on Threads:

What song lyric resonates with you the most? Mine is “we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little loony”

Seen just now on YouTube:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

Just landed via Messenger:

No revenge, because losing someone like me is enough.

Going viral on Reddit:

The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first.

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