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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

The voodoo magic of a tranquil night’s sleep

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Yesterday I went to a fight and a baseball game broke out.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

“Is this a joke to you?” Unfortunately, everything is a little bit of a joke to me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Your annoying online persona has captured my heart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

4,045

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I want a chiropractor to crack my entire body like a glow stick.

Live now on Discord:

I’ve found God. It’s my turn to hide now.

Just landed via WeChat:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Just landed via YouTube:

Grant me the supernatural ability to change the things I cannot accept.

Breaking via YouTube:

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

Making waves on Discord:

It’s nice to have a moment to breathe before reality knocks the wind out of you again.

Just landed via TikTok:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Seen just now on X:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all day if you’re constantly holding a coffee cup?

Funny turn around quotes

Funny turn around quotes bring a hilarious twist to life’s unexpected moments 🤪🔄 When plans flip and surprises pop up, these witty lines keep the mood light and laughter flowing 😂✨ Get ready to embrace the unexpected with a smile and a chuckle—because sometimes, the best comebacks come with a clever turnaround! 😎🎉

New funny turn around quotes 👇

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

0

2 months ago

around, bike, exercise, hate, having, humor, i, pick, pick-up, return, return trip, stationary, stationary bike, thing, trip, turn, turn around, workout
You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

0

2 months ago

around, eclipse, emotion, heart, humor, me, relationship, thing, turn, turn around, want

All funny turn around quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on Reddit this month:

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

14 shares on Telegram this month:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.

68 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Getting real tired of my own bullshit.

50 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

69 shares on Threads this month:

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

40 shares on Twitch this month:

Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.

99 shares on Slack this month:

Surely, this is the hangover that will teach me my lesson.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone hates math until their paycheck looks funny, then all of a sudden you know trigonometry.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to put “No DMs” in my bio to pretend that I’m attractive.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing is more fake than my friendliness on the phone at work.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Cars should have two horns, one for “excuse me, kind friend,” and another for “curse you and your family for generations.”

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

20 folks are currently checking 👀

We use our phones to watch videos that remind us of what life was like before we had phones.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies, you’d almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

4,015

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Out of Office: I am on vacation. Your emails will be forwarded nowhere to be read by no one. Good day.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

I hate when people tell me I need to “get out of my comfort zone,” like I don’t even have a comfort zone; I am literally always uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Just paid my bills, so don’t ask me to come out. I’m at home getting my money’s worth.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I went from dancing with myself in the 80s to talking to myself now.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m here by unpopular demand.

Making waves on YouTube:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

In the autumn there are two types of creatures who collect acorns: squirrels and toddlers.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I be butt naked, texting people, and they’ll never know.

Just landed via Telegram:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Spotted on YouTube:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Just landed via Snapchat:

Don’t invite me anywhere last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

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