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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

I don’t need therapy. I need everyone who’s ever wronged me to suddenly feel a chill and not know why.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

A girl, her bed, and TV series on a Friday evening is a true love story.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Can I come over and overstay my welcome?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,316

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Telling your child their sibling is still asleep a very effective way to get them to practice their instrument.

Just landed via Reddit:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying seems to be working.

Trending via Twitch:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Not all angels are in heaven, me for example, I’m at work.

Trending via Telegram:

If we were subway rats, I’d share my pizza crust with you.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Amazon cart: Order now and it will arrive today. Amazon confirmation email: LOL, just kidding, it’ll be a week from tomorrow.

Spotted on Telegram:

Daylight savings is not enough. You need to be daylight investing.

Seen just now on X:

I have this epiphany every night that I need to turn it up a notch.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

Funny upper quotes

Funny upper quotes are here to brighten your day and lift your spirits with a splash of humor 😂✨ Whether you need a clever pick-me-up or a witty twist to share with friends, these playful lines will have you grinning from ear to ear 😄📈 Ready to turn that frown upside down? Let the laughter and good vibes flow! 🎉🙌

New funny upper quotes 👇

All funny upper quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Discord this month:

Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

49 shares on Instagram this month:

Me passing someone: you slow mule! Me being passed: okay, speed racer!

48 shares on TikTok this month:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

52 shares on Twitch this month:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

We need a slur for people that use AI.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

36 shares on Facebook this month:

My kids want to know what’s for dinner, like they’re going to be happy with the answer.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing I expect that we will learn from the vibe coding era is that most ‘idea guys’ don’t actually have very good ideas.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When the salesman from the hearing aid company calls, I stay on the line and answer every question with ‘What?’

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Insomnia is embarrassing. How can I be so bad at something that literally involves doing nothing?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,751

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

There’s endless songs out there about love and pain and life, but basically only one about the wheels on the bus. Just goes to show you they nailed it the first try.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

I wish rolling your eyes burned calories.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Sorry for widening my eyes and whispering “The prophecy” when we first met.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

No parenting book prepares you for the stank of your kid’s soccer bag.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Just the owls and I out here enjoying the breeze amongst the trees.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Trending via Reddit:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Seen just now on Discord:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Shared recently on Messenger:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Shared recently on TikTok:

This can’t be the life I protected with a mask in 2020.

Trending via Facebook:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Trending via Facebook:

Establish dominance by dropping your panties first.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

My phone just filmed a 2 hour documentary about life inside my purse.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

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