Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

In your 20s, you will be tempted to prove that you’re doing well. It’s important you resist performing for an audience that isn’t watching.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Everyone else time traveling: Preventing wars or the spread of disease. Me: Buying multiple pairs of my favorite shoes they’ve stopped making.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

“You look tired!” Bro, I want to stop existing.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I’m not fragile like a flower. I’m fragile like a bomb.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,248

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Apparently, telling your friends not to stress about their wedding because “it’s your first marriage” is not the right thing to say.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Spotted on Instagram:

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Going viral on Telegram:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Broadcasted on X:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Shared recently on Instagram:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Your DM doesn’t match the Bible quote in your bio. Uh-oh.

Breaking via TikTok:

From now on, every time I think I’m hating too much, I will think of Kendrick and realize I’m not hating to my full potential.

Just shared via Telegram:

I’m going to bed, everyone. Try to keep it down.

Funny whispering quotes

Funny whispering quotes are the perfect way to sneak humor into quiet moments 🤫😂 Whether you’re sharing secrets or just want to lighten the mood, these witty whispers bring a smile without shouting 🎉💬 Get ready to giggle softly and spread laughs in the most hush-hush way possible! 😜🤭

New funny whispering quotes 👇

All funny whispering quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Threads this month:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

91 shares on Instagram this month:

Toasters aren’t governed by that little dial. They have free will.

50 shares on Slack this month:

Work again? Really? Didn’t I just do that yesterday?

77 shares on WeChat this month:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

100 shares on Discord this month:

Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

46 shares on X this month:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

65 shares on X this month:

The sexual orientation where you’re attracted to both and men and women but they’re not attracted to you is called Bi-yourself.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

93 shares on Reddit this month:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nostalgia isn’t as good as it used to be.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Please take your Apple Watch off if you are wearing a dress or formal attire. You look like a spy kid.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Garlic bread is my therapist now.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have a welcome mat at my front door because I’m not a liar.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,558

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Venn diagrams. You either love ‘em or you hate ‘em. Or you’re somewhere in the middle.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

We interrupt coverage of one horrible story for breaking news of another horrible story.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

If you stare at your face in the back of a spoon you look a lot like someone who doesn’t know how to use cutlery.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I need to watch his hairline recede.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Making waves on Instagram:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

Seen just now on Telegram:

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

The rumors of my will to live have been greatly exaggerated.

Trending via YouTube:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Just shared via TikTok:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Just landed via Threads:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

Seen just now on Slack:

Being the forward-thinking person I am, I kept my winter fat through the summer.

Making waves on Twitch:

Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

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