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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Until I open the wrapper and look inside it’s Schrödinger’s Kit Kat.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

There are only two portion sizes for mashed potatoes: nowhere near enough (posh restaurants) or far, far too much (literally everyone else).

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I always thought orthopaedic shoes were overrated, but I stand corrected.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

If McDonald’s sold hot dogs, would you be able to, with a straight face, order a McWiener and tell them to supersize it?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

You know those couples who share their food? I mean, what kind of people are they? Aren’t they hungry?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1873 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,035

Funny Quotes Topics

14,822

Funny Quotes Images

12,035

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Shared recently on Discord:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

Seen just now on Messenger:

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I’m doing well at accomplishing nothing today and I’m very proud of myself.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

Seen just now on X:

I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Breaking via Facebook:

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

Going viral on WeChat:

I enjoy the freedom of speech, because if you let crazy people talk, they’ll totally tell you they’re crazy.

Seen just now on X:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Spotted on WeChat:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

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Funny wisdom tooth quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1873 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,035

Funny Quotes Topics

14,822

Funny Quotes Images

12,035

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,451

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Googling symptoms until you cry.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Eat whatever you want. If someone calls you fat, eat them too.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

They should invent harmless cigarettes for aura farming purposes.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

When you really want to slap someone, do it and say, “Mosquito!

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Trending via WeChat:

I’ll never salute you, General Settings.

Spotted on TikTok:

The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I had to treat myself to a sweet goody today to distract my mind from the horrors of life.

Live now on Twitch:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Making waves on Threads:

Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Mother’s Day before we wake her up and ask what’s for breakfast.

Making waves on Instagram:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Reported on Messenger:

Technically I’m still young, but according to my back pain I’m actually 69.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My teen would like you to know I ruined her life when I did her laundry today.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 40s: that “teenager”over there is actually 27.

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