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Commentary:
"Attending a wedding is a delicious reminder that amidst all life's complexities, cake is a universal constant 🍰💍 Who needs love when there's layers of frosting to devour, am I right?"

activity, cake, celebration, fun, fun activity, going, humor, important, important things, life, me, things, wedding

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I have never “lit up a room” unless you count arson.

0

2 months ago

arson, comedy, count, humor, i, joke, light, lit, never, room, self-deprecation, wit
Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

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2 months ago

age, animal, animals, crazy, family, funny question, humor, mom, older, only, question, why, year
I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

0

2 months ago

awareness, check, humor, idea, life, life update, marriage, married, media, reality, reality check, relationship, social, social media, surprise, update, world
Hike in groups. Bears like to have options.

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2 months ago

adventure, bear, group, hike, humor, nature, options, outdoors, safety, wildlife
Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

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2 months ago

activity, bin, break, childhood, cigarette, equivalent, humor, nostalgia, pencil, school, sharpening, taking
Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

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2 months ago

affection, anniversary, card, communication, date, humor, i, love, paperless, relationship, sorry

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

60 shares on Threads this month:

Wish I came with subtitles because I mumble a lot.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

89 shares on Slack this month:

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

93 shares on Threads this month:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

It’s finally actually Saturday after just thinking it was Saturday every day for the last five days.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Sorry, I’m poor, I can’t afford to pay attention.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Welcome to middle age. Everything you encounter is either blurry or too loud now.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

You sound unhinged. Let’s go get mugshots.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

If anyone has any experience with anything or knows anything about something, please let me know.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Welcome to middle age: your chin looks lonely; here’s another one.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

People in their late 20s and early 30s are like “this is my emotional support trip to Japan.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I do not have a “body count.” I have a curious spirit.

Just landed via Messenger:

Me at a nightclub: Where are the chairs?

Shared recently on Facebook:

All of my passwords are protected by short-term memory loss.

Just shared via Messenger:

Roses are red. Pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large. And none of it’s for you.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

Live now on Snapchat:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Just landed via Facebook:

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skill set I simply wasn’t born with.

Trending via Facebook:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I have never “lit up a room” unless you count arson.

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Hike in groups. Bears like to have options.

Sharpening a pencil at the bin was the childhood equivalent of taking a cigarette break.

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨