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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Tonight I will make history, by turning off incognito mode.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I composed this post in a way that only the sexy can read it, so congratulations.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Totally forgot my demands now that I’ve strapped this ticking bomb to my chest.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

I have re-entered the Band of Brothers rewatch stage of male depression.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I wish companies would use pictures of models looking frazzled and exhausted on their websites, so I can get a real idea of what their clothes will look like on me.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

357 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,626

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,626

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,510

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

I think we just need to accept that the 90’s was our peak as a species.

Making waves on Discord:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Coffee just tastes better when you are the only one awake in the morning.

Trending via Pinterest:

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

Going bananas on Discord:

I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Just shared via Threads:

What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ‘k’ instead of ‘ok’?

Going bananas on YouTube:

In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

Shared recently on X:

Date idea: you tell me every thought you’ve ever had about me.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

I love how all the Black Friday deals this year are just the price of the item before the tariffs.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When the only thing that drops lower than Black Friday prices is my self-control 😂🛒🛍️

before, black, Black Friday, consumer, deal, deals, discount, Friday, humor, i, item, just, love, price, sale, shopping, tariff, tariffs, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

2 months ago

acceptable, away, awkwardness, bored, boredom, care, conversation, honesty, humor, i, norms, say, self-expression, social, social norms, walk, walking, walking away, wish
Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

5 months ago

bakery, calling, crepe, dough, food, food joke, humor, joke, opening, pun, weird
When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

2 months ago

eye, humor, moon, night, November, season, time, weather
I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

6 months ago

beach, body, casual, confidence, humor, self-deprecating, summer, vacation
I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

2 months ago

completion, dedication, humor, i, management, minutes, procrastination, task, time, time management, weeks, worrying
The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

2 months ago

bullshit, dating, devil, humor, life, love, me, reach, relationship, struggle, sure

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on WeChat this month:

A big part of aging is accumulating keys and not knowing what they’re for.

100 shares on Telegram this month:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

78 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

29 shares on Reddit this month:

My favorite animal is me when my feelings are hurt.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

60 shares on Facebook this month:

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

48 shares on YouTube this month:

My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

21 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

These aliens are taking forever.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

People who lie all the time really think that we don’t know.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Took a good look at my finances. I won’t make that mistake again.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Dad Hack: Get your teen’s attention instantly by pre-heating the oven.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Hi. I didn’t mean to “like” your tweet. I was scraping dried jelly off my phone.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

One of my biggest faults is that when I ask someone their name, I forget to listen to what their name is.

Live now on YouTube:

If she says “it’s fine,” you’re probably in trouble.

Making waves on Pinterest:

A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

Making waves on Messenger:

Waking up early is always beneficial. You just gotta make it past those first 10 minutes of being irritated.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Live now on Instagram:

Candy companies will look you straight in the eye and lie about how they know what a banana tastes like.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I love how all the Black Friday deals this year are just the price of the item before the tariffs.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

I like to do a task by worrying about it for three weeks and then finally dedicating 10 solid minutes to completing it.

The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨