Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Flirting back when you’re bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Okay, that’s enough todaying for today.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Hey, are you an aurora borealis or why am I waiting in vain for you to appear?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

There’s literally no law that says you can’t put your friends down as your references and pretend they were your boss at an old job. Literally, there’s no law that says that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,593

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Discord:

Coworker: Hey, circling back on that thing we talked about in December. Me: Stop living in the past!

Live now on LinkedIn:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Going viral on Threads:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Breaking via Reddit:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Breaking via Reddit:

Where does everyone go to get kisses? I haven’t figured this out yet.

Going viral on Telegram:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Going viral on WeChat:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

If you don’t like me, remember: it’s mind over matter. I don’t mind, and you don’t matter.

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If you don’t like me, remember: it’s mind over matter. I don’t mind, and you don’t matter.
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Commentary:
Mind over matter, the ultimate life hack! 😎🧠✨

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Reddit this month:

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

34 shares on YouTube this month:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

Whenever someone asks me if my dog is adopted I respond with, “no, she’s biologically mine.”

36 shares on Facebook this month:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

44 shares on X this month:

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

95 shares on Threads this month:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you refuse to let go of.

32 shares on X this month:

Sometimes nature makes art, like trees, waterfalls, and the human butt.

19 shares on Instagram this month:

The closest I get to a spa day is when I’m draining pasta, and the steam smacks me in the face.

84 shares on Twitch this month:

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

Just cleaned out my junk drawer if anyone needs a CD to reinstall Windows 95.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Just the owls and I out here enjoying the breeze amongst the trees.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Please don’t take illegal substances. Or at least, don’t take MY illegal substances.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

You’ll never be as lazy as the person who named the fireplace.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Thursday.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody has ever been given a cheeseburger and been upset about it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,532

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Enjoying the consequences of my actions.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

The winter months remind me that it is crucial to find someone that you’re thermostatically compatible with.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Imagine earning a science degree then having to be a meteorologist who announces the prophecy of a groundhog.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

People aren’t too bad if you stay away from them and don’t go outside.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

Relationship tip: Make sure you’re the crazy one.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Going bananas on Discord:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Need to win the lottery so I can focus on going to museums and working out.

Going viral on Messenger:

God, I’m not trying to rush you for my soulmate; but could I get the tracking number?

Trending via TikTok:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I can resist everything except temptation.

Making waves on Snapchat:

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

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