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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

What if your dog one day just randomly said “Nobody is going to believe you” and never spoke again.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Well, it took several decades, but I might have finally run out of things to say.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Why do Marvel movies need 3 hours to accomplish what The Powerpuff Girls did in 11 minutes?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

I think we should all try to spend more time online. It seems to be helping society.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,506

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m not getting fatter. I’m increasing my content.

Going viral on Pinterest:

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Going bananas on Threads:

Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

Just landed via X:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I love the smell of someone burning their last bridge with me.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Everyone who got my kids board games for Christmas, when are you coming back to play with them?

Shared recently on Telegram:

“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

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If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old mystery of disappearing socks! 🧦✨ Apparently, playing a little game of hide-and-seek with your socks is the ultimate trick to summon the missing one. Who knew laundry could be this entertaining? 😄🔍 #LifeHacks101"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m a kid at heart and a senior citizen at my knees and back.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

One day you’re 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you’re 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.

76 shares on Pinterest this month:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

96 shares on Facebook this month:

Selfish people are my favorite because you never have to guess their motives.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

I am thick and tired.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

My son just turned an everything bagel into an everywhere bagel.

16 shares on Threads this month:

I’m liking your IG photo from 8 days ago because IG just showed me today!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If she doesn’t post you, take her phone, go live and introduce yourself!

24 folks are currently checking 👀

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Caffeine: the adult version of fairy dust.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My body is a vessel for various dips.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I laughed at your bad joke. I was trying to flirt.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife didn’t order anything from Amazon yesterday, so the driver gave us a knock this morning to make sure we were OK.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry that I bit you, I was trying to flirt.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,319

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Tuesday is just Monday wearing a fake mustache.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I’m upstairs and the food is downstairs. Send help.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I’m not always a couch potato. For instance, right now I’m a chair potato, and later I’ll be a bed potato.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Spotify Wrapped, but for all your bad decisions this year.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Going viral on TikTok:

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

Just landed via Snapchat:

It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.

Trending via Slack:

Boy, did The Shining nail what it’s like being an only child.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I can’t wait to hit my 80s & run for Congress.

Going viral on Slack:

Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of saving.

Just shared via Slack:

Customers will say shit like, “Uhh, it’s asking me to remove my card?”

Trending via LinkedIn:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

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