Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

I love to sleep, I wish I could get paid to sleep.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance: waiting for the bathroom.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,319

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

Making waves on Slack:

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

Going viral on Twitch:

Men don’t eject their eyes from their sockets and yell awooga anymore.

Spreading quickly via X:

There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

Just landed via Twitch:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Just landed via WeChat:

Website: We use cookies to improve our performance. Me: Same!

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Awake and pretending to be productive. My bed is filing a missing person report. 🛌😂📋"

awake, emotional, humor, humorous, office, please, privacy, quarantine, respect, sarcasm, stress, times, trying, working

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

0

2 months ago

craft, exam, final, final exam, humor, looming, qualification, study, weaver
People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.

0

5 months ago

humor, joke, misunderstanding, nap, naps, people, productivity, relaxation, rest, sleep, think, time, understand, waste, work
When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

0

4 weeks ago

common, death, definition, die, disappointed, disappointment, history, humor, i, just, language, misunderstanding, search, search history, sure, through, using, word, words
It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

0

2 months ago

bad, Bob, Bob Ross, boss, character, choice, fictional, fictional character, humor, irony, mob, mob boss, never, nice, ring, ross, too, violence, wake, wake up, woke
Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

0

2 months ago

happiness, head, health, humor, joy, laughter, mental, mental health, need, release, relief, sometimes, stress, stress relief, thoughts, uncontrollable
I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

0

2 months ago

buffalo, buffalo chicken, chicken, diet, dieting, food, food humor, healthy, healthy option, humor, i, irony, let, love, me, men, option, quesadilla

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My theory is that women’s voices contain frequencies that men simply can’t hear.

47 shares on X this month:

“Are we still going?” … An introvert’s attempt to cancel.

29 shares on Discord this month:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

97 shares on Snapchat this month:

People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

40 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

People who take two steps on the stairs are both active and lazy at the same time.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

Flirting with submissives is actually really easy. All you gotta do is send a gif of a small animal and say, ‘This is so you.’

31 shares on Facebook this month:

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

36 shares on X this month:

None of the parenting books say what to do when your kids start calling you ‘Bruh.’

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Nothing is impossible, except for my daughter returning home with the hat and gloves she wore to school this morning.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

I have good problem-solving skills, but my problem-creating skills are where I really shine.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

Trending via YouTube:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Just shared via YouTube:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Spotted on X:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Seen just now on X:

You ever just see a tree and be like, “Bob Ross would’ve liked this one”?

Just shared via Messenger:

I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Just landed via Threads:

Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨