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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Underrated life skill: only doing what feels genuinely right and letting everything else go.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

When someone says “I expected more of you”, I’m always like “well who’s fault is that?”

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Hey (with the intention of getting ice cream).

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Any tips on being smart? For someone just getting into thinking.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,266

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Facebook:

I’m done with self-care. Time to learn some spells.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Might mess around and reply to all work emails with “make me”.

Just shared via Pinterest:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Starting a new life today, bye.

Spotted on YouTube:

Why is adulthood just bills and wondering what to eat?

Just landed via Messenger:

This year has gone by so quick. Christmas is basically tomorrow.

Trending via Twitch:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

1 week ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about cats confidently landing on the moon if Earth explodes, playful and humorous.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"That’s one small step for cats, one giant leap for feline-kind! 🐾🌕🐱"

animals, cat, cats, convinced, Earth, explosion, feet, humor, land, landing, moon, safely, safety, space, whimsical

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Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on Snapchat this month:

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

62 shares on Threads this month:

Before they perfected the Q-tip, you have to wonder what kinds of horrific things went wrong with tips A-P.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

80 shares on Slack this month:

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

80 shares on Instagram this month:

The morning routine that takes the longest: finding the will to live.

85 shares on Threads this month:

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

95 shares on Slack this month:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

80 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re not dropping it like it’s hot, then what the hell are you doing?

28 shares on X this month:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

My default setting is sexual energy.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Give yourself time to heal. A couple of decades should do it.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

Going viral on WeChat:

The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

Making waves on Threads:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I just need a day between everyday… to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the day coming.

Live now on Messenger:

What if your dog one day just randomly said “Nobody is going to believe you” and never spoke again.

Trending via Instagram:

Every few months, the urge to eat buttered toast will possess you.

Breaking via Discord:

There’s nothing more satisfying than the little nap you have after hitting snooze on your alarm.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

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Activity Log ✨

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Remember when Mustangs were muscle cars and not an embarrassment to the name.

Pizza rolls are comfort food because they look like little pillows.

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m convinced that if Earth explodes, all the cats will land safely on the moon, on their feet.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Help, I accidentally used dark humor with normal people, and now they’re concerned for my mental health.

Remember when Mustangs were muscle cars and not an embarrassment to the name.

Pizza rolls are comfort food because they look like little pillows.

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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