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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

I literally never want to be the bigger person again. We can both go to hell.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Due to unfortunate circumstances, things are no longer fergalicious nor bootylicious.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

The thing I’ve always found tricky about money is knowing how much I should have.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

You better be kissing the screen when I send pics.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

This meeting could have been a push down the stairs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2384 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,546

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,546

39 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

I need a leaf blower, but for people.

Just shared via Instagram:

You think you’ve seen gold diggers, until you see a male friend group where only one of them made it.

Breaking via X:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Just shared via Facebook:

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a Like.

Breaking via Telegram:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m not like other girls. I don’t have a podcast.

Just landed via Reddit:

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

Just landed via Messenger:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Going viral on WeChat:

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

Jan 26, 2025

It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”. I don’t even know where that is.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the mystery of the built-in antenna! 🤔📺 It seems like nowadays even our electronics are trying to confuse us with their origins. Who knew Antenna was the new tech hub making all our TVs? 😅 Next thing you know, our toasters will be labeled "Made in Pop-Upville"! 🍞🏗️ #GlobalVillageMysteries

America, antenna, built, confusion, even, humor, i, irony, just, know, nothing, shame, technology, TV, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2384 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,546

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,546

39 minutes ago

3,462

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Went to the toilet today without my cell phone. There are 245 tiles.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Digging my own grave, because I gotta do everything around here.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Imagine if social media closed every day at 6pm like a shop.

Just shared via Telegram:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Just landed via Facebook:

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

Live now on Facebook:

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

Seen just now on Slack:

The healthy food in my fridge should be grateful really. It survives much longer than everything else.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Our dog snores so loud, we had to rename him Grandpa.

Seen just now on YouTube:

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

Trending via Reddit:

If ever go missing, please only put pictures of me on the news where I look skinny and hot even if that means they won’t find me.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.

Trending via Slack:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

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