Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Oh, the eternal struggle of wanting to devour everything in sight but also magically lose weight! 🍔🤷‍♀️ Who needs logic when you can just skip straight to the end result, right? 🤣 #DietDilemmas

diet, eat, eating, fitness, food, health, humor, i, just, less, simple, simplicity, want, weigh, weight

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Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Facebook this month:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

96 shares on Discord this month:

My toxic trait is thinking every inconvenience is the universe personally attacking me.

45 shares on Instagram this month:

In the morning: Tired! At lunchtime: Tired! In the evening: Tired! In bed: “Everybody dance now!”

88 shares on Facebook this month:

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

13 shares on X this month:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

92 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m really looking forward to another exciting year staring at my phone.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Listen to your body? The body that craves a lethal amount of Kinder Bueno?

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.

10 shares on Instagram this month:

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

The thumbs up emoji is a nice way to tell someone not only did you receive their message, you’re also done with the conversation.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

My soulmate probably seen my posts and deleted me.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Spotify Wrapped: February was your basketball watermelon loudspeaker phone call hip hop moment.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Seen just now on Telegram:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Live now on Messenger:

Do men know they don’t have to date if they’re not over their ex?

Going viral on Slack:

Jehovah’s Witnesses tell the worst knock knock jokes.

Seen just now on Threads:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Going viral on Telegram:

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Spotted on Pinterest:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Breaking via Messenger:

Cows are very calm, considering the whole floor is food to them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

By age 40, you should have an entire wardrobe of clothes—one size too small—that you keep in eternal optimism that you’ll fit in them again one day.

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Keep the laugh going 😂

By age 40, you should have an entire wardrobe of clothes—one size too small—that you keep in eternal optimism that you’ll fit in them again one day.

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

When I worked as a restaurant critic, I wrote under a nom nom nom de plume.

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨