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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Raising a teenager is like nailing pudding to the wall.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Sarcastically saying “you’re welcome” to the people who don’t say thank you when I hold the door for them is something I’ll never stop doing.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I installed a bike rack on my car so my neighbors think I do something else besides drink.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

The only thing I gained this year is weight.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t have mirrors in my house. I mean, who wants to see disappointment everyday?

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Do goalies ever get lonely during a game?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,326

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Being weird never goes out of style.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

Making waves on Instagram:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Going viral on X:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

Trending via Threads:

A haunted house but in every room someone is asking you to say a little something about yourself.

Shared recently on WeChat:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

Trending via WhatsApp:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

“Nothing beats in-person interaction”. Yeah, with someone I know and love, not Denise from finance.

Playful quote about preferring close friends over awkward office interactions.
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Commentary:
"Ah, the joys of in-person interaction – feeling the warmth of a familiar face, not facing a spreadsheet ninja like Denise from finance 🤣🤝 #OfficeDrama"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Twitch this month:

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

33 shares on WeChat this month:

When you’re feeling down, just turn up the music a little louder.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

I need you to think about me 23/7. You get 1 hour a day for yourself.

62 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

59 shares on X this month:

I want a girlfriend so she can make me do shit like pottery, and I act like I don’t want to go.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

I’ll bet the guy who invented the snooze button never invented anything else.

55 shares on Facebook this month:

Stop bothering me, or I will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people, but I can tell you are not yet aware of.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Naps are like gambling for the tired. You either wake up refreshed or too late to lots of angry texts.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

In case no one told you today. I’m beautiful.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My whole life is basically a blooper reel.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“It’s not that deep!” Well, I have a shovel and I enjoy digging for meaning.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t argue with her. Just say “you remind me of my ex” then walk away.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,739

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Just saying “Think about it!” is enough to overwhelm many people these days.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

When Dr. Seuss wrote, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” he did not consider how comfortable my couch would be.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Ghosting is disrespectful unless it’s me doing it.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

Just shared via Instagram:

There are two types of people at work: Those who work and those who have become pros at looking busy.

Making waves on Slack:

Hopefully it won’t be as bad as it already is.

Just shared via Slack:

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Going bananas on Reddit:

The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

My phone just filmed a 2 hour documentary about life inside my purse.

Spotted on TikTok:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

Going bananas on Threads:

She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.

Making waves on X:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer. Plus, it’s fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

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